Lessons I’ve Learned as a Mom

“What are your greatest child training tips?”

Every time someone asks me this, my mind draws a blank!

I am not an expert, nor do I have the answers. In fact, it feels like the more kids I have had, even the answers I thought I had no longer seem to work.

But recently when someone asked, I jotted down three thoughts. They are nothing ground breaking or new (there is nothing new under the sun), but lessons the Lord has taught us as we are raising our children. I pray they are a blessing!

1. Get their heart.

There is a reason that the mom in Proverbs 31 said, “My son, give me thine heart, and let thine eyes observe my ways.”

If we can get their hearts, they will want to obey. They will want to follow.

No amount of discipline will help if we do not have their hearts. It will only make them more angry and harden their hearts towards us – and God.

I can always tell when a child is needing more love if they start acting out more.

Many times I’ve noticed this comes out at the most inconvenient, or busiest times, of our lives…like maybe during a big move.

Yes, we have to deal with any disobedience or attitudes. The worst thing we could do for them is just excuse their behavior because “they’re going through so much!”

Deal with it lovingly, but firmly. Then make a special effort to show love to that child more at other times. It will take effort and time on your part.

(Side note: if the attitude is because of circumstance -hungry, sitting too long – deal with the attitude of course, but try to take care of those needs of food and play times)

It may take a little while to win back their heart, depending on how long ago it was that you lost it, but I have noticed a complete attitude change when they feel securely loved!

They don’t become perfect (neither am I), but correction is better received coming from someone you love who you know loves you! – Which leads to my next tip.

2. Be Consistent in Discipline.

Some may argue that this should be number one, but I feel like discipline will not be effective unless your child feels loved.

A sure way to undermine your discipline is to be inconsistent in your disciplining.

If you say not to touch the drawer, but you feel too tired and allow them to disobey sometimes, they will not think they have to obey.

Another way is not following through when you’ve given a consequence if they disobey.

We can get so tired from our daily “duties” that we let things go…and they can sense it!

Be consistent, dear Mama! Always follow through, and your children will bring joy and rest to your soul!

Lastly….

3. Involve Them in as Many Activites as Possible.

Oh! How I know how exhausting this can be!

There was a time when I had five kids ages 6 and under. I understand how letting them help can add tenfold to your already tiresome workload!

Stirring and mixing ingredients can end up with your kitchen covered in flour.

Letting them help wash dishes can result in a soaking child and needing to mop – no need for a filled mop bucket because your floor has enough water on it.

How tempting it is to just do it yourself!

BUT if you involve them when they are little, they become the biggest blessings and helps!

I’m coming out on the other side of that and can testify to it! My older kids and teens have gladly – without me even asking – taken over the house for me a few times. Wow. When they do that, I feel SO incredibly blessed!

So, even if none of this is new to you and you are already doing this, I pray I can encourage you,

“And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.” Galatians 6:9